On the Job Training
February 8th, 2010I was recently hired on after a 4 month contract-to-hire at the coolest place I’ve ever worked. Hooray!!! I’m sure one day I’ll move along, but until then I’m remembering the steps along the way, and the things I’ve learned.
My first job was at a call center, telling old folks why I interrupted their dinner (around 4pm) to talk to them about long distance. They were always so happy to talk to me. I’d call them sir or madam. They’d call me dickhead or asshole… God, old people are sweet.
What I Learned: Some old people really are paying way too much for long distance because the rates weren’t competitive back when they signed up. Oh, and they don’t give a fuck.
I switched to a job working for a friend’s mom, but when I decided to start fudging my hours, that was short lived.
What I Learned: If you’re going to say you were at work, maybe going out to eat during those hours where your coworkers may be is a bad idea. Consider picking up Taco Bell.
Wendy’s hired me to be the back room bitch. Peel onions, take out the trash, mop the floors and wash the dishes.
What I Learned: The chili is made from yesterday’s hamburger patties that didn’t sell (they are stored in a drawer throughout the day) and the “frostys” aren’t made of ice cream, but some weird liquid in a bag.
In a fairly small town, the big news was the new Super Wal-Mart. I started in layaway, which was a sweet gig. We would hide out in the storage, occasionally do weird crap like try out pepper spray as a floor cleaner or race the scissorlift. Strictly professional, of course. Before I got fed up and quit, they made me a cashier.
What I Learned: When you delete stuff from your layaway, the staff rarely bothers to remove it from your box, so you still get it without paying for it. Within a limited range, the cashiers can just okay a price difference. Some are just bitchy. You can make your own coupons by scanning the barcodes from real coupons and photoshopping your own.
For a short time, I delivered pizzas. In a nutshell, I learned that you can make some pretty decent money, but you might get held up for it later that night (not me, but it happened a lot).
When I first moved to Indianapolis, I went to work for Great Expections cold calling people and making them feel like losers for being alone. I didn’t stick around long…
What I Learned: Places like this make you bring a credit card as proof of ID, then run it to see how much you can spend on it and charge you accordingly.
I’m sure there are plenty more bits of knowledge to pass on, but I’ll save that for another day.
What have you learned from a previous job?



